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What’s up, dudes? There are a lot of classic Halloween commercials! They’ve shaped our perception of the spooky season since we were little. Lyle Perez from The Halloween Podcast joins me live to watch some of the wild and creative ‘80s Halloween commercials!
We begin with Count Chocula recoiling in fear of Count Dracula. The Invisible Man and the Mummy also try to get cheap mufflers at Meineke. Meanwhile, Count Scary attempts to persuade us to pick up some 3D glasses at our local Wendy's restaurants. His widows peak is out of control!
Ogilvy Mather created two memorable commercials. The first has young lovers accidentally combining peanut butter and chocolate at viewing of a scary movie. The second sees Frankenstein's wretch combine the two after his resurrection. Then follows Ronald McDonald talking with McNugget buddies in Halloween costumes. Oh, and Vincent Price even hawks Polaroid video cassettes. We also see Elvira plug Coors!
A killer stalks his prey to a John Carpenter synth score clone. As he approaches his victims, he snatches the Coca Cola out of their hands. As it turns out, it's only a sister in a face mask and curlers! Hideous!
Catchy jingles? Check. Cheesy, eerie messages? Of course. Monster shenanigans? Definitely! So grab your Dipps, head to McDonald's with their certificates, and enjoy this episode on '80s Halloween commercials!
It’s a ‘90s Christmas Podcast
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The Halloween Podcast
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Amazing Advertising Podcast
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What's up, dudes? Stephen King has had a huge influence in the horror genre, and that includes werewolves. Jeremy Phelps the Alamo City Santa is with me to talk all about the 1985 movie "Silver Bullet!" In a small town, it's hard to hide as a bat-wielding bear-like werewolf (bear-wolf?), unless you're a reverend, of course.
Siblings Marty and Jane have a contentious relationship. Things get crazy when people start dying around the full moon. At first, the deaths are chalked up to accidents, but when a young boy is torn to shreds, a posse forms. Naturally, more deaths follow.
Marty attracts the werewolf's attention shooting off fireworks, but manages to injure its eye. Consequently, he enlists Jane's help in tracking down the culprit, searching for one-eyed persons. They discover Rev. Lowe with a new eyepatch, and confront him. He attacks, but is killed when their uncle shoots him with the specially crafted bullet. All's well that ends well.
Small town? Check. Rubber snakes? Yep. Rocket powered motorbike wheelchair? Only if Gary Busey made it! So grab your fireworks, hop in your own Silver Bullet, and ride the rickety bridge to this episode!
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What's up, dudes? It’s a beloved holiday staple, and it’s turning 70 years old! Yes, the 1954 Bing Crosby/Danny Kaye classic “White Christmas,” first released on video in 1986! Ken Kessler from Sounds of Christmas, Scott Leopold from Holly Jolly X'masu, and Jeremy Phelps the Alamo City Santa join me to reminisce about the crooner and the comic and the song that gives all the Christmas feels!
Private Davis saves Captain Wallace’s life in the war, and so they team up as a performing duo. As big time stars, they seek out the sisters of an old army buddy who are performing as a singing act. After rescuing the sisters from a scam, they follow them to Vermont to spend Christmas relaxing and skiing. As it turns out, the inn they’re staying at is owned by their formal General.
Seeing how the lack of snowfall has crippled his inn, the quartet sets out to change his fortunes. They concoct a scheme to get their old unit back together. Meanwhile, the quartet get all Hallmark-y and lovey-dovey. There are classic miscommunications and misconceptions, but all’s well that ends well. Oh, and it snows, too!
Musical numbers? Check. Choreographed dance sequences? For sure. Christmas? Well, at the very beginning and very end, at least. So put on your Santa suit, sing “White Christmas,” and celebrate the 70th anniversary of this classic!
Sounds of Christmas
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What’s up, dudes? La la la la la la! They’re three apples tall, and Jeff Loftin from Lost Christmas is here with me to talk all about their Christmas adventures! Yes, it’s “The Smurfs Christmas Special!”
In this 1982 special, the Smurfs prepare their smurfberry pudding as they trim the tree. When Greedy eats the last walnut, they venture into the woods. Meanwhile, a grandfather is regaling his two grandchildren with tales of Santa Claus when their sleigh overturns. Of course, the children leave to retrieve help and run into Gargamel. After sending them away, he’s visited by a diabolical stranger who offers him a Smurf-destroying scroll in exchange for the two children.
Luckily, the Smurfs run into the children who think Papa Smurf is Santa Claus. Unfortunately though, the stranger apprehends the children and Gargamel and begins a ritual to send them all to hell. The little blue guys show up and sing their Christmas tune “Goodness Makes the Badness Go Away.” The stranger vanishes, and the Smurfs make a Christmas wish to restore their village. Oh, and the kids are saved . Gargamel gets nothing.
Brainy Smurf? Check. Papa Smurf? Got ‘im. June Foray Smurf? Only if it’s Jokey! So grab your Phrygian cap, speak in Smurf-talk, and sing along to this episode on “The Smurfs Christmas Special!”
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What's up, dudes? I've got Ken Kessler from Sounds of Christmas and Scott Leopold from Holly Jolly X'masu here to talk the mutant disco/no wave album “A Christmas Record!” From ZE Records, it was a triumph of experimental Christmas music.
Founded in 1978 by Michael Zilkha and Michel Esteban, ZE was one of the most popular rated labels, capturing the emerging New York sound of the period. They gained exposure through a distribution deal with Island Records. In fact, before long they had signed such acts as Kid Creole, the Waitresses, Was (Not Was), Cristina, and James White. Called “the best independent record label in the world” and “the world’s most fashionable label,” they closed their doors in ‘84.
In 1981, ZE released a Christmas compilation album as a lark. Of course the album is noted for standout alternative tracks “Christmas Wrapping” and “Christmas on Riverside Drive.” Davitt Sigerson’s “It’s a Big Country” is a folksy little ditty that plays as a newsletter of sorts, tucked into a Christmas card. Unfortunately, some of the songs don’t quite hit as hard. Suicide’s “Hey, Lord” is a depressing number and Alan Vega’s “No More Christmas Blues” feels like just the opposite.
Synthesizer? Yep. Funk rhythms? Got ‘em. Bummer Christmas songs? For sure! So grab your record player, put “A Christmas Record,” and listen to this episode!
Sounds of Christmas
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Holly Jolly X'masu
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What's up, dudes? I’ve got artist, author, and adventurer Ryan Estrada here to talk about his new book “No Rules Tonight” on Christmas in Korea in the ‘80s! Curfews and banned books and dance clubs! Oh my! It’s a fascinating look into true events!
Kim Hyun Sook is in college, and she’s being eyed as the new leader of the Banned Book Club. To top it off, it’s Christmas Eve, so traditionally this is when the Dance Club heads up the mountain to par-tay!
Speaking to the true story that inspired both books, Hyun Sook said, “Banned Book Club is a story about the harsh realities we faced while living under a dictator. But at the time, we did not think about ourselves as living in a dystopia. We dealt with many problems and tried to make the world a better place, but we were still living our lives, making friends, falling in love, and having fun. I wanted to make a book about finding the joy in life when the world doesn't seem to want you to be happy. About discovering yourself in a world that seems hostile toward your very existence. Banned Book Club was about the sacrifices we made, the truths we hid, and the dangers we endured. I want readers of ‘No Rules Tonight’ to understand that the most important step to make the world a better place is
to be your true, authentic self.”
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What's up, dudes? Jeremy Phelps the Alamo City Santa and Sean Sotka from the Christmas Podcasts Podcast join me to talk all about 1980’s “The Christmas Raccoons!” It’s an ”Inception”-like dream/reality hybrid of pink aardvarks lumber barons and talking raccoons. It’s also Canadian and narrated by Rich Little.
The trees begin to disappear rapidly. Someone is cutting them down, and Ranger Dan has to solve the mystery. As he goes off into the wilderness leaving his poor children at home, some plucky raccoons soon find their own dwelling chopped. Ralph, Melissa, and lazy Bert were decorating for Christmas too. What a shame.
As they investigate, they mistake the ranger’s children for the tree cutters and sneak into their cabin. It turns out, however, that the culprit is Cyril Sneer. The raccoons, along with their new sheepdog friend Schaeffer ambush Cyril, and get him to discontinue his assault on the Forest. Subsequently they move into the tree in front of the cabin.
College educated nerdy son? Check. Raccoon stockings? Got ‘em. Christmas tree Yggdrasil upon which Midgard hangs as an ornament? Definitely! So grab your coat, put on your scarf, and sled down to this episode on “The Christmas Raccoons!”
Christmas Podcasts Podcast
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What’s up, dudes? What if Kevin McCallister had a mullet and was super into Rambo? Now we’ve got “Dial Code Santa Claus” or “Deadly Games” or “Game Over” or “3615 code Père Noël”! Yes, this many-titled French film is bonkers, and I’ve got Jeff and Jay from Horror for the Holidays with me to talk about it!
Thomas is an incredibly intelligent young boy whose mother is a wealthy store manager. On Christmas Eve, he makes contact with a vagrant (escaped mental patient?) through a pre-internet Minitel. Subsequently the vagrant poses as Santa, and even goes so far as to get a job at the manager’s store. He’s summarily dismissed after slapping a child.
Eventually, wanting revenge and to play with Tommy, he hijacks a store can and drives to his house. Tommy, with an out of control mullet and a Rambo attitude, has to defend his house and his diabetic grandfather from the psychotic Santa. He “Home Alone”s his house and with his technological genius, sets up traps to counter the dog-killing intruder. Cut to a Bonnie Tyler song.
Trapdoors? Check. Flocked beard? Got it. Grandpa hiding in a suit of armor like Gossamer from Looney Tunes? For sure! So grab your arm band, load a toy grenade with gunpowder, and stop wacko Santas with this episode on “Dial Code Santa Claus”! Or “Deadly Games,” or…
Horror for the Holidays
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What's up, dudes? Horror expert Matt McGrath from Nostaljunk joins me to talk the blatant cash grab that was the awesomeness of "Friday the 13th!" When Camp Crystal Lake is going to reopen, a group of unsuspecting teenagers are brutally slaughtered one by one! Randy teens? Check. Copious amounts of gory death? Yup. Twist ending? The twistiest! So grab your machete, hop in a canoe, and drift to the center of the lake with this episode!
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What's up, dudes? Remember Dumbo? Well, he had an early Disney Channel Show, and I've got Mike Westfall from Advent Calendar House and Thom Crowe from ‘Tis the Podcast with me to break down the (quasi-) Halloween episode! Yes, it's "Dumbo's Circus!" Dumbo and friends get into a spooky mood!
Lionel, dressed in a Cobra Kai skeleton costume, surprises Dumbo and Sebastian while they're doing chores. The creepy attire spurs Dumbo and gang to put on a spooky circus show. Meanwhile, Rinkum and Barnaby are delivering a package and get lost in the woods when their package rolls down a hill. All the friends put on monster costumes, including a vampire, Jacob Marley Ninja Turtle, banana sheet ghost, and Hamburglar witch. They break up into pairs to head into the deep, dark woods to get supplies for their performance. Barnaby and Rinkum happen upon several of the friends in their macabre garb and are frightened, until they realize the spooks are merely Dumbo et al. After joining them, they do a Thriller dance to end the show!
Spooky costumes? Check. Misunderstanding? Yep. Blatant ripoff of Michael Jackson? Definitely! So grab your costume, put on your chains, and dance along to this episode all about "Dumbo's Circus!"
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What’s up, dudes? They say the sequels are never as good as the first. I think The Empire Strikes Back proves them wrong…but Band Aid II doesn’t. I have music journalist Alex Rawls from The Twelve Songs of Christmas and My Spilt Milk with me to talk all about the second version of the charity song done in 1989! Spoilers: it’s not as good as the first, but it’s still fun!
On Friday, December 1, 1989, Bob Geldof called Pete Waterman to ask if he would consider producing a new version of “Do They Know It’s Christmas.” Waterman was part of The Hit Factory, a production team made up of himself, Mike Stock, and Matt Aiken. They were known for hi-NRG or Eurobeat style, with tempos usually somewhere between 102-140bpm, four-to-the-floor kick drums, staccato hi-hat, and bass lines frequently looped with fast eighth or sixteenth notes doubled at the octave. In fact, they produced 13 UK #1 singles and 3 US #1s. Waterman even postponed his wedding and rallied several artists together.
Subsequently, on Sunday, December 3rd, the assembled artists recorded at PWL Studios in South London. Bob Geldof and family were present. On Tuesday, December 5th, the updated version was played for the first time on London’s Capital Radio, 95.8 Capital FM. Advanced sales reached 500,000 copies, and the single was officially released on December 11th. It spent 3 weeks at #1, though Band Aid’s original hit spent 5 weeks at #1 and sold over 2 million copies (which was approximately $24million in sales).
Kylie Minogue? Check. Bros? Yep. Cliff Richard? A little out of place, but he was definitely there! So grab your denim jacket, put on an uptempo kick drum backing track, and jam out to this episode all about Band Aid II!
The 12 Songs of Christmas
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What’s up, dudes? It’s a “Family Matters” Christmas with Matt Eurich from the TGI Podcast !” Yes, the show focuses on Harriette Winslow, elevator operator and head of security for Larry and Balki’s newspaper, and her family. Of course, it came to be known for breakout character and über-nerd Steve Urkel!
In the season 2 episode Have Yourself A Merry Winslow Christmas, the Winslows are thrilled to learn the Urkels will be away for Christmas. Unfortunately, Steve ends up staying and annoying the Winslows, especially Laura, whom he fancies. When he accidentally breaks her grandmother’s ornament, she berates him and throws him out of the house.
Meanwhile, Rachel enlists Carl’s aid in finding Freddie Teddy for little Richie. He subsequently gets trampled Cabbage Patch Kids-style and is unable to find the doll for her. Afterward, Laura of course changes her mind, and reconciles with Steve, inviting him to spend Christmas with her family. On Christmas Day, Richie finds the Freddie Teddy that Santa delivered, and this “Family Matters” Christmas ends happily ever after.
Funky Franky? Not quite. Fuddy Duddy? That’s not it either. Freddy Teddy? Yep, under the tree. So grab your genuine canvas wallet, tape it to your heart, and Have Yourself A Merry Winslow Christmas!
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What’s up, dudes? Spooky season is here! I’ve got Michelle Kidwell from Michelle’s Spooky Library and Anthony Caruso from ‘Tis the Podcast with me to talk the Halloween episode 'Hallowinnie' of the sitcom “Free Spirit!” It’s the 1989 sitcom about a good witch who becomes nanny(?)/housekeeper(?) to a divorcé and his 3 kids. Oh, and there’s Christmas in it too!
Jessie is waiting to see if she’s been accepted into the popular girls group the Debs. Meanwhile, Rob's girlfriend has just dumped him, and his dad is eager to win a costume contest at his firm's Halloween party. Jessie, in order to impress the Debs, holds her own Halloween party. It all goes wrong when Jessie is turned invisible and Winnie can't undo the spell. Apparently, there's so much magic being tossed around on Halloween night that Winnie's power is diminished and running haywire. Luckily, while invisible, Jessie sees the Debs' true colors, and, after Winnie finally fixes her spell, decides to dump them. They also fly their brooms across the moon. It's a Halloween tradition, after all.
Corny jokes? Check. Zatanna-inspired costume? Yep. California raisin mistaken for rabbit droppings? Definitely! So grab your broom, put on your mask, and fly into this episode all about Halloween on "Free Spirit!"
'Tis the Podcast
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What’s up, dudes? They’re heroes in a half shell, and they’re green! That means it’s the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! I’ve got Tim Williams from 80’s Flick Flashback, Nicholas Pepin of Pop Culture Roulette, and Laramy Wells from Moving Panels here to talk with me about the mutated ninja Michaelangelo. Yes, it’s his Christmas adventure “The Christmas Aliens!”
In this one issue micro-series, Michaelangelo is exploring the streets of New York during the holiday season. He stumbles upon a stray cat that he names Klunk. Mike decides to do some last minute shopping and heads downtown, which is teeming with fellow shoppers. With a precarious disguise, the ninja goes into a toy shop and amuses himself with different items—much to Klunk's dismay. Unsurprisingly, the scaredy cat runs off into the alley, and Mikey goes to find him, discovering some thugs hijacking a truck. Or course, the vehicle is full of "Little Orphan Alien" dolls which are going to be donated to an orphanage. The crooks don't care about good will toward men, and they knock the driver unconscious and steal the truck, dolls and all.
Meanwhile, Klunk cries out and the burglars hear him. Consequently, the street toughs spot Mikey and open fire on him with their handguns. The ninja takes out most of the hoodlums, who freak and flee in the truck. He manages to hop inside the back of the vehicle as it speeds away and get the better of the thieves, deciding to drive the truck to the orphanage himself. Unfortunately, despite his good intentions, the police are looking for the vehicle and when they spot it, a chase ensues. Mikey manages to elude the police, but not before he accidentally destroys public property. Once he's escaped the fuzz, he stashes the truck away in an alley. The toys will be impounded as evidence, so the orphans won't receive them in time for Christmas. Mikey gets his brothers to distribute the toys to the orphans.
‘80s punks? Yep. Lots of snowfall? It’s Christmas, after all. Armed robbery? Of course! So put on your Santa suit and mask, grab your nunchucks, and stop some crime to this Ninja Turtle Christmas episode!
80’s Flick Flashback
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What’s up, dudes? It’s time for another Christmas-adjacent episode! This time, I’ve got the Saturday Morning Mafia with me to talk about “The Princess Bride!” Yep, it’s Christmas time, and Columbo—erm, Peter Falk—reads his sick grandson a fantasy story. There’s fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles... in other words, it doesn't sound too bad.
Westley the farm boy falls in love with Buttercup. When he goes off to seek fortune to marry her, his ship is lost at sea. Years pass, and Buttercup is now betrothed to Prince Humperdinck. Suddenly, she’s kidnapped by a giant, a Spaniard fencer, and a criminal mastermind. A mysterious man in black eventually rescues and reclaims her, and reveals himself to be her Wesley.
Unfortunately, it’s all a plot to start a war, and Buttercup’s murder will be the inciting scapegoat. Consequently, Westley is mostly killed, and the Spaniard and giant revive him with help from a disgraced Billy Crystal…I mean, Miracle Max. With their assets combined, they bluff their way into the castle, get revenge on all the baddies, and escape to live happily ever after. Oh, and there’s some kissing in it too.
Fred Savage? Yep. Andre the Giant? Got him. Masters of the Universe toys and Santas in the background! Inconceivable!! So grab your sword, put on a holocaust cloak, and hop in your wheelbarrow to this episode on “The Princess Bride!”
Christmas Clatter
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The Wonderful World of Nothing
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What’s up, dudes? Merry Dinosaur Day! Shawn Robare from Cult Film Club, Crestwood House, and Plastic Rocket Pop and I talk the 1987 cartoon “Dinosaucers!” It’s good dinos versus evil tyrannos as two dinosaur alien factions fight for freedom!
It’s Dinosaur Day on Reptilon, and the Dinosaucers are set to return to their home planet for the celebration. The Tyrannos decide to spoil it for Bonehead by telling him Stego-Claws isn’t real. Consequently, the dejected dino refuses to go back home for the holiday. Luckily. He’s visited by the actual Stego-Claws who takes him and David on a trip to deliver presents on Reptilon in his sledosaucer pulled by Rude Ralph the red-nosed rhamphorhynchus.
The Tyrannos ambush the trio at Stego-Claws’s workshop. Using furball elves and Bonehead’s devolved pachycephalosaur self, the trio escapes and delivers presents to good dinosaucers. At another house, they again encounter the Tyrannos, and again, with Stego-Claws’s magic, they defeat them. Bonehead and David return to Earth, and, with renewed belief, Bonehead joins his friends for Dinosaur Day.
Stego-Claws? Check. Rude Ralph? Yep. Saucertoe? Well, they don’t have missiles on Reptilon! So put your finger aside your snout, hop in your sledosaucer, and fly to this Dinosaucers Christmas episode!
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What's up, dudes? There’s more than meets the eye here with illustrator and podcaster Jerzy Drozd as we talk all about Transformers UK comics Christmas issues! From Starscream to Optimus Prime, we get into all of it, and deck the halls with boughs of Hot Rod…waitasec…. Yes, it’s Transformers Christmas miracle edition!
In Transformers #145 from 1987, Starscream feels homesick, which shows that even evil robots can get the Christmas blues. As he ponders his plight, a young boy tries to teach him the meaning of Christmas. He encourages the Decepticon to explore emotions and actions of goodwill, even convincing him to help a bus full of elderly folks. Unfortunately, Streetwise the Autobot attacks him, thinking his intent is for ill. The boy admonishes Streetwise for his unprompted cavalier assault, and the Autobot watches helplessly as the Decepticon rescues the stuck bus. Streetwise apologizes and escorts the bus to safety, leaving Starscream ultimately to reflect on the experience. Turns out, he didn’t like helping, but he thoroughly enjoyed humiliating his enemy.
In Transformers #198 from 1988, a newly resurrected Optimus Prime, now a Power Master, mulls over his attachment to Earth with indifference. As he isolates himself to think, the other Power Masters see on the news a town destroyed by giant robots. Inevitably suspecting Decepticon involvement, thee heroes investigate, only to find the culprits were Autobots overindulged in Christmas shenanigans. Of course Optimus Prime finds them all, and renews there commitment to protect the citizens of Earth. Indubitably, it’s a glorious day!
Giant robot fights? Yep. Good versus evil? Got it. A story about nothing? Only a very Seinfeldian one! So hop in your robot buddy and roll out to this episode on Transformers Christmas comics!
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What’s up, dudes? We interrupt your regularly scheduled summer day to bring you this special news bulletin! Yes, Mike Westfall of Advent Calendar House and Tim Babb from Can’t Wait for Christmas are one the scene with me to talk all about the 1989 “Sesame Street News Flash: Santa Claus” sketch!
From episode 2592 of season 20, this three minute news flash sees ace reporter Kermit the Frog attempt to catch Santa in the act of delivering presents on Christmas Eve. The sketch was directed by Jon Stone, and was originally titled ‘A Clean Sweep.’ Our green correspondent hides behind a family’s Christmas tree, and springs into action upon hearing a noise from the chimney. To his great surprise, a “Bert from Mary Poppins”-esque chimney cleaner, C. Sweep, tumbles out of the fireplace. Apparently he was hired to unclog the chimney! And on Christmas Eve of all times!
Kermit admonishes the Victorian London sweep and encourages him to clean the chimney post haste! Unwittingly, C. Sweep clears the obstruction, and out pops Santa Claus himself! This is why Gary Shandling greases his chimney. Santa immediately sits to rest, and Sweep jumps on his lap and starts reciting his Christmas list. Kermit gets dragged into the whole charade. It’s almost as wacky as the time Kermit saw the holiday mascots get mixed up.
Mandatory Jerry Nelson voice? Yep. Anything muppets? Sweep and Santa, of course. Flustered flippers? Only Kermit’s! So grab your microphone, hide behind a Christmas tree, and help a chimney sweep unclog this episode about “Sesame Street News Flash: Santa Claus!”
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Can’t Wait for Christmas
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What’s up, dudes? It’s another entry in the Christmas Adjacent category! That’s right! We’re talking “The Last Starfighter” Tim Williams from 80’s Flick Flashback, Joe Fulton the Christmas Aficionado, and DJ Chad Sheppard.
Alex Rogan is a regular kid from a trailer park. When he beats the high score on a starfighter arcade machine, an alien named Centauri recruits him to defend the frontier against Xur and the Ko-Dan armada. Centauri takes him to space where he meets his copilot Grig, but the overwhelming expanse of his new responsibilities scares Alex. He demands to be taken home. Reluctantly, Centauri agrees.
Back home, however, a Xandoxan assassin is hunting Alex. After defeating the alien, Alex learns of the destruction of the entire fleet. He returns to the starport, mounts his gunstar, and launches a solo attack on the armada, destroying it with the death blossom attack. He subsequently returns to Earth, picks up his girlfriend, and flies back into space to rebuild the gunstar fleet.
Aliens? Check. Cool space battles? Yep. Christmas? Well… maybe a mention or two here and there. So don your spacesuit, hop in your fighter ship, and destroy the armada to this episode on “The Last Starfighter!”
80’s Flick Flashback
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Christmas Aficionado
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Check us out on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Totally Rad Christmas Mall & Arcade, Teepublic.com, or TotallyRadChristmas.com! Later, dudes!
